Rash of Bad Luck
I'm always one of the lucky ones who get to experience the rarest conditions, the ones with the tiniest percentage of occurrence. I'm not sure why this luck doesn't come to me when I play Black Jack or slot machines. My latest jackpot is a lovely pregnancy rash made especially for pregnancies of multiples - and almost always when the babies are boys.
This condition is so consuming that I hardly notice that I'm extraordinarily uncomfortable with all the body parts stretching and kicking at me. I'm just about to scratch my skin off - I'd rather have bloody stumps than this maddening itch on my belly, between my fingers, on the palms of hands, on my ankles, and even on the soles of my feet!
After trying prescription steroid cream and oatmeal baths, I've come to the conclusion that the best relief (however temporary) is ice packs. Luckily though, all the doctors say the rash will completely go away after the babies are born. So that means I only have to wait about 9 more weeks. That's if I don't jump off a bridge by that time...